Wednesday, April 06, 2005
Graphical illustration
Heard of Gardner’s Multiple Intelligence?
According to that test, I am high in
Spatial Intelligence^.
You’ll soon find out why.
Ways to deal with People you hate, dislike, loathe, abhor, despise, abnominate… !
*warning: M18. contains explicit contents.
PLEASE DO NOT TRY THESE AT HOME.
Try them outside.
Tactic 1: Potato Wedges
Target: people who are oh-so health-conscious, those who loves to eat salads.
Tool(s): mesh wires
Method: squeeze them through the mesh wire. just like how French fries are made.
Note: sprinkle tons of salt.
Tactic 2: Magic clean
Target: people who criticise you for being a clean freak
Tool(s): washing machine, detergent, butcher’s chopper
Method: chop up their limbs, collect the parts and dump everything into the washing machine.
Note: Since it’s a large washing load, be sure to use one cap full of detergent.
Tactic 3: Bounce baby out the door
Target: people who should have been blind
Tool(s): bare hands
Method: using two fingers of either right or left hand, reach out to the person’s eyes. Scoop them out. Bounce them out of the door. The eyes I mean.
Note: use your stronger hand so that both eyes can be settled at one go.
Tactic 4: Free fall
Target: people who keep cats in school
Tool(s): rat/ mouse
Method: lure the cat out for the room. Throw the rat/ mouse down the block. Since cats love rats, cats can be happily continue to haunt rats even in death.
Note: repeat 8 times if necessary. Get 9 rats/mice. As the saying goes, a cat has nine lives.
Tactic 5: Through the wall
Target: people who are simply irritating. e.g. those who jumps around on your bed, with or without dirty feet.
Tool(s): super power hands
Method: place target in front of the wall. Smash.
Note: don’t believe your physics textbook. Work is done when one pushes the wall.
Tactic 6: Do Re Mi
Target: people who know they cant sing, yet they do.
Tool(s): thread and needle, zipper
Method: using thread and needle, stitch the zipper on the person’s mouth.
Note: recycle those zippers on luggage bags. Attach a lock on the zipper when you are done.
Tactic 7: the Last Resort
Target: on people who are simply *^%$&@#
Tool(s): thumb tacks
Method: push all thumb tacks into the flesh
Note: push in at right angles. It saves you effort. Oh yes. Use a variety of colours.
Power intelligence, don’t you agree?
Disclaimer: the words and thoughts do not represent that of the blog owner.
^Readings: The spatial intelligence manifests in a variety of ways. Transforming mental images is a spatial skill that engineers and designers depend on. When a hiker pauses with map and compass, it is the spatial intelligence that conceptualizes the path. Through the spatial sense, a painter "feels" the tension, balance and composition of a painting. Spatial ability is also "the more abstract intelligence of a chess master, a battle commander, or a theoretical physicist" (194), as well as the familiar ability to recognize objects, faces, and details.
dictated by the Queen at 2:49 AM
